Cancer at 20-Something

In today’s episode, I sit down with Peter Laneas to explore a deeply personal and incredibly powerful story, what it really feels like to face cancer as a young adult, and how that experience shaped the life he’s living today.

Peter opens up about the moment everything changed, the emotional and physical challenges that followed, and the often-overlooked realities of navigating cancer during a time of life when most people are building careers, relationships, and dreams for the future.

This episode isn’t just about hardship, it’s about transformation.

Peter shares how he reclaimed control after treatment, shifting from survivor to advocate, using his story to raise awareness and create community for others walking a similar path. His honesty, insight, and strength offer a message that every listener can carry with them:

✨ Your story doesn’t end with diagnosis.
✨ Your voice matters.
✨ You can rise, rebuild, and even thrive.

We also dive into the meaningful work Peter is doing today to support people living with cancer from advocacy initiatives to community leadership and peer support.

Whether you’re living with cancer, love someone who is, or want to better understand the young adult survivor experience, this episode will leave you inspired, informed, and reminded of the power of turning pain into purpose.

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Transcript

[00:00:00] Kathryn White: Welcome to the Living to Thrive with Cancer podcast. I'm Kathryn White, holistic cancer coach and author. This is the place where we trade fear for hope, confusion for clarity, and overwhelm for empowered action. Whether you are newly diagnosed, living with cancer, or navigating life beyond it, each episode I'll share tools, insights, and real life inspiration to help you create a life that feels good to live right now in the middle of it all.

[00:00:29] Let's thrive together.

[00:00:35] Welcome to episode 5.8 of The Living to Thrive with Cancer Podcast. Before we dive into this episode, if you are a new listener, I want to welcome you to the podcast as a cancer thriver. I use my stories and experience with stage four colon cancer to guide you through your walk with cancer. As a cancer coach, I want to help support you through creating a health building lifestyle, managing your stress, and helping you to navigate.

[00:00:59] The day in and day out stuff that comes up when you have cancer. In today's episode, I am talking with Peter Lan. Hello Peter. 

[00:01:09] Peter Laneas: Hello. 

[00:01:09] Kathryn White: Welcome. Um, I'm super excited to have you here and I wanna tell everybody a little bit more about you, and then you and I are gonna get into an amazing conversation. 

[00:01:19] Speaker 3: Sounds awesome.

[00:01:20] Awesome. 

[00:01:21] Kathryn White: So Peter is a passionate advocate, public speaker, and media professional, committed to amplifying the voices of those navigating life altering health and social challenges. A two-time testicular cancer survivor and LGBTQ plus advocate. Peter has spent over 15 years using his lived experiences to drive meaningful conversations on patient's rights, men's mental health and social equity.

[00:01:46] Peter's career in advocacy spans multiple leadership roles, including serving as the national spokesperson for the Canadian Testicular Cancer Association Steering Committee member for Health E Matters since inception and represented Canada as vice president of EVE and violence everywhere. His work with EVE focused on supporting women in cases of intimate partner violence, while also addressing the broader impact on families and communities.

[00:02:14] As a male advocate, Peter Champions a balanced approach calling for accountability while providing a compassionate space for men seeking support. Beyond his advocacy, Peter has an extensive background in media and communications. Having worked as a television host, producer, and speaker at international conferences, his ability to connect with audiences through storytelling has led to numerous media features, including his widely recognized role as the first LGBTQ plus story highlighted.

[00:02:44] By the Princess Margaret Home Lottery. He has been interviewed by major publications, radio podcasts, and TV interviews, sharing insights on survivorship, resilience, and the intersection of health and identity at Cancer Fatigue Services. Where Peter works, he leads advocacy and engagement, ensuring that those facing post-treatment fatigue have access to the support and resources they need.

[00:03:08] He is dedicated to breaking down barriers to care. Reshaping the narrative around cancer recovery, emphasizing that fatigue should not be an accepted norm, but a challenge that can be overcome. Peter's mission is clear to uplift, educate, and inspire using his voice and platform to create lasting impact.

[00:03:30] Peter, you're like a rock star. 

[00:03:34] Peter Laneas: I just like that you use the abbreviated version. That's so comforting. I It means a lot. It means a lot. 

[00:03:40] Kathryn White: I, I love, I love your bio because it is so diverse. Like you have done so many amazing things and where you are currently working, we're gonna talk about that. But just the different touch points throughout your life, your very young life by the way of, of being able to support other people.

[00:04:00] So. I really feel like it's important, um, because this is a podcast for people who are living with cancer. For you, if you would, to share your story and, um, I know that you were a very young adult when you were diagnosed, if you could maybe talk to that as well, that would be great. 

[00:04:18] Peter Laneas: Absolutely. And, and again, sincerely and adamantly, thank you for having me for this.

[00:04:22] I'm always, it's always a privilege to be able to share your story and understand that. You never know when what you are sharing about yourself will be that roadmap for another person. It doesn't have to be exactly the same thing, but enough that there's some level of seeing yourself that it's a lot less intimidating.

[00:04:42] It doesn't feel like you're trying to pick up some random machete and go through the forest not knowing which direction is north, and you can't even see the stars to get a sense of if it's day or night. And that's definitely a feeling that, uh. Has been a longstanding theme for a long time before being able to find my way and understanding advocacy and really what survivorship means long term.

[00:05:06] Mm-hmm. Uh, as a caveat, before we get going, I am also should add to my bio that I do standup comedy. And I like to showcase that I'm a cancer comic. So for those who might be listening to this podcast, if you get a funny haha, yay, that's the goal. And it's testicular cancer that I had. So really the jokes write themselves.

[00:05:27] Speaker 3: I have to share. Peter and I had, um, a, a pre podcast meeting just to meet each other and, um, it was supposed to be an hour. It ended up being two hours and it was just like this rolling comedy show of feeding each other, testicular cancer and colon cancer jokes back and forth. It was brilliant. 

[00:05:46] Peter Laneas: It it there, there's something so beautiful when you are with, as I like to say, you're with your tribe.

[00:05:53] And you, you have that decompressed understanding of you get it. Mm-hmm. And when you're with someone who gets it, the pretenses are gone. There's no performativeness. It's just, oh, I can talk about this and that's okay. And you understand, and suddenly we're in this connection exchange where you, you resonate, you, you found a mirror.

[00:06:15] And it feels so good to know that even in those moments, I'm not alone. 

[00:06:21] Kathryn White: Yes. 

[00:06:22] Peter Laneas: Yeah, it's, uh, it feels, it feels really good. I've, uh, I've joked about it before about how, uh, in one of my previous roles with Young Auto Cancer Canada for, uh, the program local life, I always try, when I described it to people, I said, it's kind of like getting a whole bunch of war vets together in the same room where they're just pulling up a shirt and saying, I got this scar here and I got this from here.

[00:06:44] And, and. When you're with an anyone who doesn't get it, they're mortified. 

[00:06:49] Kathryn White: Mm-hmm. 

[00:06:50] Peter Laneas: But then when you're amongst your tribe, it's, it's just, it's icebreaker. 

[00:06:55] Kathryn White: And 

[00:06:55] Peter Laneas: it feels so good to just get that, okay, we don't have to worry about that, and then we can just talk about how we feel today. And it's, it's, it's, um, again, it's privilege.

[00:07:05] It's privilege to be able to connect with people like that. So, uh, okay. So my story, yes, please. And. In a little bit of a Golden Girls way. I picture it Toronto, December, 2002, terribly chilly outside. I was 26 years old and I was working in hospitality. At the time I was a bartender and living the young adult life.

[00:07:27] I mean, I was that guy who maybe got a cold twice a year. I didn't need to go see a family doctor. It just wasn't important to me. I thought, oh, just flood my system with, you know. Advil and Neo Citrin and just sleep it off and I'll be fine by tomorrow. It's absolutely healthy for you, great choices and nothing like over medicating and it's like one, two punch.

[00:07:50] Let's get rid of it. All the commercials can't be wrong. I'm just putting two commercials back to back and. I had this experience where my left testicle was getting more and more swollen, and I didn't understand what was going on, and I'm, I went into this being a health conscious individual. Uh, my, my dad's side of the family was riddled with heart disease, and I learned it at an early age.

[00:08:14] The importance of doing your best to try to maintain a clean diet, having a degree of exercise and activity in your life because you've only got one body. You need to do what you can in order to keep it running. Uh, I remember learning a long time ago about how the, the, the premise and the structure of an automobile is fashioned after the circulatory system in a body.

[00:08:39] And to think about how those things correlate, well, we're so quick to go to the mechanic. And then there's those other folks who try to fix the card themselves. And then the metaphor about how we deal with our health. Do we go to the doctor? Do we try to fix it ourselves? What's the right answer between, we just kind of want to get there and don't want to hear that thud happening from underneath the hood anymore and feel okay.

[00:09:03] So I'm dealing with the thud under my hood and I didn't mean to make it work out that way, but it actually sounds 

[00:09:09] Kathryn White: great. That was really good out really well. That was my first time 

[00:09:12] Peter Laneas: saying it like that. I went to Toronto Emergency after I was done work, and I thought, okay, you know what? I'm just gonna ask them because they know more than I do, so.

[00:09:24] I got misdiagnosed. Uh, and I'm not saying it's the discredit of anyone for five weeks straight, uh, every week progressively it was becoming more painful. My testicles swelling even more heavily and I was getting different diagnoses 'cause it all depended on the doctor that was in front of me. And different, uh, different physicians are.

[00:09:44] More general, some are more specialized and what's in front of them, their training is going to dictate what they identify out of reflex. And that's totally cool. But when you're 26 years old and you're coming in and you're hearing things like, what, what statistical torsion, well, I was terrified to find out actually what a torsion is when you're a risk of, uh, necrosis of the testicle because it twists and doesn't unw loses its blood supply and could die.

[00:10:10] That's. Completely outta my range. Couldn't even process that. Uh, terms like mesenteric adenitis, it's a inflammation of the lymph nodes that can cause a radiating pain to the testicle. I learned something today. Great. And then being told that I probably have an STD just sent me home with antibiotics and painkillers, and my first thought was, shouldn't I be having sex in order to get an STD?

[00:10:33] I haven't lately, so doesn't really quite add up. And that was its own, you know, personalized shame and having to try to reconcile that I've got this ailment in my reproductive organ and that's got its own separate conversation when it comes to masculinity identity, personalized shame, all the jokes that I've ever heard in my life about, oh, just have the balls to do this.

[00:10:56] Well, one of them is the size of a kiwi. And I don't know what's going on. So week five rolls around, stroll in, and I completely lucked out that the physician on the floor was a urologist. He took one look and he just said, CT ultrasound, let's go. And within about. Two hours. I was standing there in, you know, the ever glamorous hospital gown.

[00:11:20] I was naked from the waist down, dripping ultrasound, lube, all over the floor. And my roommate at the time was there for support and then the doctor came in and said, you've got to stick your cancer. It's stage three A and we have to operate tomorrow morning. And I can only speak for myself, but I feel like when I speak with other folks who've been diagnosed with cancer, the second you hear that C word, it's like the room freezes.

[00:11:48] You remember every detail, like I remember the chipping of the paint in the emergency room. I was in emergency room nine. I remember where the bed was, the layout, the things that were on the, it just everything stopped. And as much as I adore my roommate at the time, he just, um, completely panicked, raged out, and just went, oh my God, you've got testicular cancer.

[00:12:14] So I did the only thing I knew to do, which was to put my arms around him and say, it's okay. Yeah, you'll be fine. Oh, can I get that painkiller now? Yeah. One for my ball and one for all this. And that's where it started. Wow. 

[00:12:34] Kathryn White: And 

[00:12:34] Peter Laneas: it, it turned into a rush surgery, getting asked whether or not I wanted to get a prosthetic.

[00:12:41] Um, I had to address fertility issues. They talked to me about treatment through chemotherapy afterwards because of my stage. And it was just this whirlwind and it all happened so fast. The only thing I could do was fall back on what I understood as a. Mediterranean raised North American male is all right, put your head down, barrel through, and think about feeling afterwards.

[00:13:09] Kathryn White: Mm. 

[00:13:09] Peter Laneas: And that is kind of what got me through and leaning on comedy was definitely a part of it. Trying to make light of the situation. Unknowingly caretaking people within my immediate vicinity. 'cause I was more worried about how they would, might treat me differently once I'm now using this word cancer.

[00:13:28] That has never been a part of my vocabulary outside of maybe talking about a movie or a TV show that talked about cancer. Yeah. It never impacted me directly. So it was, um, it, it was, it was, there was one hell of a door getting kicked open. 

[00:13:45] Kathryn White: No kidding. I'm just reflecting in my mind of where I was when I was 26 and I was already married and, uh, had my first child.

[00:13:54] So I can't imagine like being like, I was in a totally different world than you were, but I'm just thinking about like the having to go to the hospital by yourself again and again and again. The misdiagnosis, the having to manage that, and then having your roommate with you when you actually find out the news, like it's just.

[00:14:14] I like as a 26-year-old, I, I reflect and I think, like I wasn't be prepared to be a mom, let alone to have like the whole C word dropped in your lap like that. 

[00:14:28] Peter Laneas: That's, I think, um, it, I, I think it's, it speaks a lot about the young adult demographic where, where we. In our respective stages of life, we sort of have these assumed understandings of where we're supposed to be.

[00:14:42] And during that time of like your twenties into your early mid thirties, you should feel invincible. 

[00:14:50] Kathryn White: Yes. 

[00:14:50] Peter Laneas: Like you're able to go through whatever you can bounce back from any life circumstance. And we're we're led to believe, not necessarily a fairytale life, but. Things shouldn't be hanging over us. Like there shouldn't be a shadow in the periphery.

[00:15:08] And it's, and then there's that aspect of when you hear about a young adult, you, you immediately think compassion. Sometimes it, it almost feels like an overtone of pity of, oh, that's so sad that happened to you at this age, but then when it's you, it's just e everything shatters. And when it came back together, uh, I like to use the expression that I started seeing the world through.